Some crying, The bitch, and my wardrobe {Mommy-Brain Mixer}


Let's talk about these last few days.  They haven't been the best in mommyland for me.  I've been exhausted.  I've had littles that don't want to sleep.  My brain won't shut off.  A nagging feeling that I'm not doing enough.  Also some new year's goals that aren't taking off like I wanted them too.  I have started couch to 5k again, so that's a bright spot.  Bright spot if you mean that I hate running until I'm actually doing it.  This post may seem scattered... But so am I.  It's the lack of sleep.  Currently I write this with yesterday's made up face, 2 day old slept in yoga pants, and hair past it's shampoo date.  It's a glamorous life I lead...
 
Some Crying
I let Mac scream it out last night in an effort to get her to sleep.  The child is almost three, so the idea that this is insane isn't lost on me.  Let's talk about the fact that she actually can open her own door, so letting her cry it out, is now off the table.  The kid will not nap when she needs too, then on her own accord falls asleep in random places, at random times (say 6:30 pm), then wakes two hours later fully refreshed and ready to tackle the night life.  I'm too old for this kind of crap.  God help me. 
 
The Bitch
That would be me.  Last night.  I threw a tantrum that trumped Mac's.  I was angry that another night had been manipulated by a 2 year old.  That my night was going to be spent on a now defunct bedtime routine.  That it was another slap to my cheek at how I've failed my child... Ok, that last one is a bit too dramatic even for me.  We did our bath, book, bed routine, but Mac just couldn't abide by it.  After staying up the night before with her until 1 am as a result of a late nap, I was done.  DONE.  So I threw a fit of my own.  Because I wanted to write a post that needed to be written all day (blogger problems, am I right?).  Because I wanted to watch the Mindy Project and Cougar Town.  Because I wanted to have just one conversation with the hubbs.  None of the above happened.  And since I yelled at Mac, the hubbs, and threw a fit, I wrestled with guilt until the wee hours when I could finally relax.  Vicious spiral of guilt.
 
My Wardrobe
This is what is happening on my fashion front.  I thought I'd throw this in just for fun, and since it's the Mommy-Brain Mixer day, you may be meeting me for the first time.  I don't dress like this everyday.  Most days I'm in yoga pants.  And just to be clear, I steal all my ideas from the fabulous pinners on Pinterest.

 
New shirt from Target with an obvious crease across the boobs.
This is why this will never be a fashion blog.
And yes that's my bathroom.
 
 
Selfie after a 2 am bedtime and 6 am wake up call.
Call me crazy.
I posted this on instagram and my peeps were too kind
in saying I looked great.
It's the sunnies people.
They hide the steam trunks under the eyes.
 
 
Me in my playoff game rally shirt.
The Niners were down, and we needed some points.
My dad suggested we turn our shirts inside out.
It's only crazy if it doesn't work, right?
Also not pictured: rally Toms.
 
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We like the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Especially me, so I know, I'm not the only one fumbling the mothering ball.




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8 comments:

  1. Love this! I always think the same thing about these crazy sleep games with my toddlers--I'm too old for this! And no danger that I'll ever be a fashion blogger either. You've got a great blog, and thanks for co-hosting the Mixer!
    Meredith
    www.themomoftheyear.net

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  2. Oh I'd be angry too... babies need to sleep early!

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  3. I don't do not sleeping, I can't handle no sleep, so mine have slept with me. My daughter until 2 and big boy was just switched to a full size bed at 18 months(never in a crib). But its big enough I can lay down with him until he falls asleep and then if he gets up to nurse I can either leave him with me (again I am lazy and don't like to disturb my sleep, my mind goes 90 miles a minute at night like yours!) or take him back to his bed! Good luck I hope you find the balance for you and your little girl!
    Hailey @ Love, Laughter and Lipstick

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  4. I love you. I have been having bitch tantrums and feel like I am getting nothing at all done, and yet I am busy all day long and I can't even grab a shower! I'm taking at least one day this weekend as a mental health day, and I say you do it too. No cooking, cleaning, or blogging! Just lounge and let the kiddos make a big mess and order food in. Plus it's too damn cold here. xo

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  5. i love this post! we're all bitches sometimes. it's ok. the sleep thing is a killer. i fortunately can sleep through even the best whining. lol...

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  6. Girl ... I hope you get some YOU time ... you have definitely earned it (and I would say have some spare earned reward time to bank). This time of year along with interrupted sleep - can make even a saint go crazy. xo HHL

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  7. Oh man I know those days well. its 4:30ish am here ans I cant sleep. forget the fact the I have a child taking up half the bed. I actually had 2 fighting animals of some kind, outside my window wake me up. then my hubs left the bed because my daughters cup spilled all over his side. so I'm laying here wide awake and I keep hearing an owl. so I start watching a movie on netflix, Leila wakes up and wants to watch w me and I keep having to frantically find the remote in the dark so I can fast forward because I forgot how much nudity is in
    Cruel Intentions.I have a feeling I may have a bit of a tantrum tomorrow myself. oh and plus I just took motion sickness meds to try and make me sleepy.
    Grrrr...

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