I think somewhere along the way in BlogLand, I got lost. I lost my way and my focus. Then I read this incredible post at EisyMorgan here and started to find my way back. It's a post about blogger self esteem, and it's just what I needed to hear.
Since I'm not shy, I will be totally honest about how I lost my way... I became fixated and obsessed with trying to out blog some pretty professional bloggers. The kind that have mucho sponsors and like hit 300k page views in a month. Uh, I'm lucky if I have 50 page views in a month. So here I was trying to re-invent my blogging wheel, and try to get more "followers"... Doesn't the sound of that just make you want to gag? When I really thought about it, I was making that gaggy face too. Seriously? What was I doing? And for the record I don't consider any of you followers, I consider you readers, since I write...RIGHT?
So I admit I was trying to be someone I'm not, and turn my lovely blog baby into something it's not. This is my place to bitch and complain, to rejoice and repent, to share and ask questions, of myself and of my readers. Many of you are readers because you enjoy the ups and downs of motherhood, and the spin I try to put on them. You like the fact that I can laugh at myself and at the daily trials of motherhood. And I hope you like that I share and over share time and time again.
I also hope that you will forgive the occasional tutorial/crafty/baker posts. All of which I like to do, but I'm no crafter, and I am certainly no baker. But I do enjoy these things, so from time to time you will have to put up with me sharing a little of this and a little of that. That said, they are now going to be because I want to do them, not because I'm trying to join a link party, or a posting contest, or a bloggy woggy do-hicky. Ok I made up the last one, but I know I've been borderline OCD about these things lately. And I'm sorry.
SO, I'm kicking my own ass, and getting back to basics. It won't be kids, mom hellish day posts all the time. I will get a little crafty and a little Easy Bake oven, if you will, but I want to write again about the things that brought me here in the first place. My life, my loves, my total hate for X-Factor since it put Glee on hiatus for way to long... Seriously!!! I need some GLEE!
I got a little crazy, trying to make a small name for myself. Trying to fit myself into a mold, that everyone knows, I will NEVER fit into. I've already made a name for myself, here, it's Absolute Mommy. It's who I am, who I'm going to be, and I hope, you will love me and keep reading anyway.